* Emphasis on Music over Story - If you're going to levy that criticism against something like Viva Las Vegas, then you're just saying you don't like musicals. So, you also don't watch Grease, Chicago, The Sound of Music, or Wicked because they break into song? You know Elvis was a very famous singer, right?
* Thin Range Of Characters - The King often played the same type: charming, moral, nice boy, with a cheeky, dangerous side. And usually a hybrid job description. Racecar Driver / Singer was a good one. But how about Army Tank Driver / Singer, Pilot / Singer, or Deep-Sea Diver / Singer? And if his character was named Tulsa McLean, so much the better.
* Formulaic Storylines - I'll get to this more later, but it's mostly a rom-com formula, with a couple of songs thrown in. Critics say the films were predictable and lacked narrative depth - I call that comforting and accessible. And in an age where Hollywood regenerates intellectual property franchises more than they make original stories, let's not throw too many stones at formula filmmaking.
* They Churned Them Out - Elvis' manager, Colonel Tom Parker, did run Elvis into the ground; he was, by all accounts, gross. But did an expensive one like Speedway ($3mil) look that much better than a cheap one, such as Kissin Cousins ($800k)? And if they didn't make so many, we'd lose movies. If he only made 1 movie in 1967, would they have skipped Clambake, or would they have done the right thing and skipped Double Trouble?

* Box Office (10): His movies made between $14 million and $280 million, so a 1-to-10 scale between those. All dollar amounts are adjusted to today's dollars.
* Rotten Tomatoes Rating (10): Just divide the critics’ Rotten Tomatoes score by 10, and you've got it - plus our only decimal values.
* Rom-Com / Love Interest (10): How good of a rom-com it is AND how great the leading lady is. Ursula Andress and Ann-Margaret can really inflate your score, if you know what I mean.
* Character Name & Occupation (10): There are some great ones here in the Elvis movie canon. For instance, Chad Gates, tour-guide/surfer/singer in Blue Hawaii, is hard to beat.
* Songs (10): One great iconic song written for the movie (like "A Little Less Conversation") will get you an 8. But you need a deep bench for a 10.
* Other Things To Look At (10): A combo of great scenery or set design (5) and a lookie-there "that guy" actor to watch (a child Kurt Russell, or a 30-year-old Ed Asner, which is a lot like 60-year-old Ed Asner).
* Premise (10): Probably a lot of rom-com in it, but bonus points if Elvis has to work a carnival or go to jail.
* Gotta See It, Career Context (10): If you're a fan of films, you need to at least see the important ones. First and last, big departures, critical faves.
* My Review (20): This is my article, so this is where my expertise comes in. I focus on the fun and how much of an Elvis Vehicle it is. Is Jailhouse Rock technically a better movie than Roustabout? Yeah. But I can certainly tell you which one I'd like to watch.

Oof. This really hastened the end of Elvis’ film career. They should have known by this time not to have him playing a Native American. And the original music in the movies was really dying out by this time. Maybe he only had 20-25 movies in him and not 31.

Maybe this was supposed to be some kind of Rudolph Valentino type thing, but it ended up being like a Bob Hope - Bing Crosby movie without the comedy. Ishtar and this movie should tell filmmakers to ditch their idea about a romp in the Middle East.

This hurts because my godfather Ed Andrews is in it. I saw this really young because of Ed and I thought it was stupid as a child. I have not changed my opinion. The poster promoting "Elvis 69" to trick people into seeing what they think is a concert movie shows what the producers and the studio thought of this one.

I know I’ve seen this film and I have no recollection of it. Not good.

It’s guilty of trying to be a real film. In terms of this list, we gotta hold that against it. It’s not an "Elvis movie" in any other way other than Elvis Presley acting in it. And no music?!

Lots of comedic misunderstandings about stolen diamonds except without all of the comedy. They tried to break the formula, at least he’s not a racecar driver in this one. Maybe Elvis really could have made two movies a year instead of three.

Another one, like King Creole, that should have been a James Dean movie instead of an Elvis movie - right away that movie would be twice as good. Tuesday Weld couldn’t even save this.

Another one I really don’t remember and I know that I’ve seen. That’s a bad sign. Bad music. Weak leading lady. Silly premise, even for an Elvis movie. That all adds up to not much.

Barbara Eden saves this, a little. I can buy Elvis as a racecar driver, a lifeguard and a carnival barker. I just don’t buy him as a Native American.

Hey, they were trying. Riverboat gambling and really doing up New Orleans. Kind of an ok rom-com and of note if you liked the girl from The Beverly Hillbillies.

Elvis made three Hawaii movies. This was the third. They should have stopped at two. I guess a movie with a lot of Hawaii is pleasant enough to have on in the background while you do the Wordle.

Worlds colliding seeing Elvis alongside a Twilight Zone era Gig Young. A pretty pedestrian corrupt boxing movie that could have been made in 1932.

I once heard Bruce Springsteen reminiscing about seeing this; I don’t see it. Just kind of weird, but looks pretty when he’s on the fishing boat.

So many cousins. Elvis plays identical cousins in an acting stretch; but in the film he also hooks up with a cousin. Is she a first cousin? Yucch. Silly premise, bad music. It only gets 7 out of 20 for me for featuring "Batgirl" Yvonne Craig.

One of his few true musicals with another singer besides him (Nancy Sinatra). I’ve heard this is the first NASCAR movie, go figure. Bill Bixby is always fun in an Elvis picture. Better than its reputation.

It’s always a little off-putting to watch Elvis be a good actor in a movie. A box office disappointment, it’s a pretty good one and Carolyn Jones totally underrated as an Elvis love interest.

If you asked ChatGPT to write an Elvis movie, this is what they’d come up with. A singing car racer with Shelley Fabares should work, but it doesn’t quite. SPOILER ALERT: Or maybe I’m pissed at a near rom-com where Elvis ends up not getting the girl.

It only took Elvis 8 years to actually kind of get into the Swingin’ Sixties. There’s a couple of weird turns in here - his love interest drugs him to keep him around. And the end of this feels like it could just be a mediocre episode of Bewitched.

Been years since I’ve seen it. It gets dinged in this list because it’s actually kind of a real movie. Not good enough for the Academy Awards, but too good to have girls dancing on a beach - it’s kind of caught in between.

I just don’t think this aged well, the whole scoring with a chick as contest premise. But Elvis coming out of the army for a movie where he’s in the Army was bound to make money. It ends up with not that much value in a retrospective.

The destitute man’s A Face In The Crowd. But they quickly figured out how to use Elvis songs in the movies.

Covers a lot of ground, the love triangle conflict at the end is really rushed. Just slightly better than Loving You (film #2) and kind of the same movie.

This is a quintessential "Elvis movie." Not necessarily good, but silly fun, Elvis is trying and a functional rom-com. This is the kind of film they used to call a "romp."

Another Hawaii movie; although it couldn’t recapture the magic of Blue Hawaii, it’s pretty and so is Stella Stevens. Also inspired Motley Crue’s best song.

This movie is nuts. There’s talk of an abortion. A nun is raped. And they spend a lot of time with a girl with a questionable autism diagnosis. But it’s a great rom-com with a really interesting ending, it’s a little grittier than most Elvis ones but it’s still charming. And I want to be at this party:

Now we’re getting good. Elvis has strangely little on-screen chemistry with Ursula Andress but hey, Ursula Andress! He’s actually got a ton of chemistry with local kid Raoul who becomes his partner in crime. Delightful, plus some cliff diving.

Maybe my love of this is a little irrational, but my band watched this a LOT when we had downtime. A terrific rom-com, but then also a good working relationship between Elvis and his erstwhile boss at the carnival, Barbara Stanwyck. Plus a motorcylce crash, carnival people, a drunk antagonist and Mr. Haney from Green Acres. That’s enough for me.

I’ve buried the lead: I think Shelley Fabares is Elvis’s best love interest, and her character here is nicer than her one in Clambake. This is pure rom-com. I just wish the music was a little stronger.

Not my absolutely favorite Elvis movie but damn close. It never really drags, plenty of things going on - including Ann-Margret. Jesus.

Totally underrated in the Elvis movie canon. This is a legitimately great rom-com. And the dynamic with his parents pushing him into the business is actually three-dimensional.

A walk-off grand slam of an Elvis movie for me. A little Prince And The Pauper plot but who cares about the plot. More great Shelley Fabares chemistry. Bill Bixby is a great heel of an antagonist. And three of the craziest musical performances I’ve ever seen in a movie ("Clambake" production is nuts, "Confidence" is weird at a children’s playground, and "Hey, Hey, Hey" has bikini go-go dancers help testing his product and a big rhyme for "goop").